Count the Dead Brain Cells

Wow. Just wow. Folks, you missed quite a weekend in Phoenix, or more appropriately, Mesa. First off, it was beautiful. I mean, literally, it was perfect weather. Palm tree-lined streets, a duck pond behind my friend's house, shorts and sandal weather...I think you get the point. But I didn't go down there to work on my tan (that's what I'm doing in January), I went to visit my ex-roommate, Josh. Was it fun? You be the judge. Here's a rundown of the weekend's activities:

-Friday-
2:45- Start six-hour drive. Little did I know the backroads I was taking were going to be curvy, poorly-lit two-lane roads that I would drive way too fast. Also, the AM station carrying Game 5 kept going in and out, but I was able to make it in for the 8th inning (I'm actually downloading it right now since I'm an MLB.TV member, which allowed me to watch every Cardinal game this season on my PC).
7:45- I arrive at my friend's house for the end of the game and act like the giddiest of schoolboys when the Cardinls win. We start drinking Jaeger bombs and Bud Lights. The bottle is gone by the time we leave to a friend's house for a costume party.
10:00- Arrive at the party. I, of course, am Chicken Cord-on-Blue. Sadly, I don't have a picture, but I do have one of Josh, who wrapped himself in Saran Wrap (packaged meat) and aother of an almost spot-on Oompa Loompa. The people here are ten times nicer than in Albuquerque. Beers flow, fun was had by all, and I warn one party-goer about what to expect when in Fiji (lots of trickery fron the natives).
1:30- We drive back to Josh's and continue drinking. We start a fire and B.S. until 5 or so when we pass out.

-Saturday-
12:00- I finally get up, feeling very hungry. I hadn't eaten since lunch the day before, so my tummy was growling for something I had been looking forward to having for a LOOOONG time. So we clean up and head out to...
1:30- In-N-Out Burger. Oh hell yeah! It was busy, but soooo worth the wait. I got the double cheeseburger combo and wolfed it all down. If you've never had it, I highly suggest it.
2:15- I ask Josh what he wants to do and he brings up doing whippits (I think that's how it spelled). I had never done them before, but of course I knew what they were. So we go to a nearby head shop and pick up...well, probably too many capsules of nitrus oxide and go back to his house.
2:45- While watching Wildboyz and a show on train wrecks, we get silly. I mean, whole body wa-wa, hearing voices, drooling type of silly. Josh needs to take a nap afterwards, and I decide to take a walk around his complex.
6:30- We buy some Pollo Loco, another bottle of Jaeger, an 18-pack of Bud Light, and some XXL Monster drinks.
9:30- Again, the bottle is gone between three of us. We drive out to a party of a friend (of course we had a DD...both nights) and this is where the night becomes a bit of a blur.
10:45- I'm really having a good time. Cool people, the keg flowing, but while I'm in line for the bathroom, someone offers me a Xanax. Jake, Josh, and I all partake. And then...

-Sunday-
3:45pm- Josh pounds on the door and asks me, who is fast asleep at the time, if I know what time it is. I guess 12ish and he tells me it's almost 4. That's a 17-hour blackout for the kids counting at home. Wow. I make a hasty departure and start the very long trip home. I'm not hungover, but I'm not really 100% either. I take far too many wrong turns leaving town.
11:00- Get home. Pass out.

Great weekend, but wow, I still feel a little off. I'm told we were very nice to everyone Saturday night, so I guess that's good. But now, time to rest and watch football. Until we meet again, fooligans...