Dignity and an Empty Sack Is Worth the Sack

Life's lessons, courtesy of the Ferengi. For all you future merchants and entrepreneurs, I introduce you to The Rules of Acquisition, a set of rules and guidelines provided to you for maximum profitability.

Three other important rules to remember:
144. There's nothing wrong with charity...as long as it ends up in your pocket.
152. A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know.
189. Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money.

And don't forget the all-important Unwritten Rule: when no rule applies...make one up. Now go make something of your life, you slackers.